Let’s get serious

When you move to a new country where you don’t know anyone and have no idea on how things work, life can take a serious toll on a relationship. So far, I have been lucky enough to have a very supportive husband who balances me out and doesn’t take my dramatic meltdowns too seriously… But if I can give a little bit of advice to the world and suggest a few things to do to make a stressful environment a little more bearable and how NOT to let that stress into your relationship, it would be these 4 points.

  1. Once a week, switch off. Turn off your cellphone, lock away your laptop and take an hour or so to just be together. Don’t even talk about work or what is freaking you out – just enjoy each others presence. Go for a walk together or go grab a coffee at your local spot. Do something that is unique to you as a couple that will be allow you both to reconnect.
  2. If you find yourself in a bad mood and something triggers an argument between you and your partner; walk away. Leave the room for 15 minutes to just clear your head, settle your emotions and give yourself time to figure out what is really pissing you off. It might not be your partner and you will realise that you are over reacting because of other stressful factors affecting your mood.
  3. Appreciate the good things. When you get a cup of tea, when they make dinner, when you go downstairs and the dishes have been washed – make sure to sincerely thank your partner. So often in relationships, there is turmoil because one person feels like they are being taken for granted. A relationship is ultimately a team experience and if you appreciate your teammate and make sure that they feel loved and not ignored, then they will appreciate you and your home situation will be a lot more polite, enjoyable and full of love.
  4. Try to keep a tidy household. In a new environment; a different country where its a struggle to establish a career or make friends, it is important to keep your home tidy. This will ensure a clearer mind when you’re at home and the cluttered life you experience outdoors won’t effect your mood indoors. In our time here in England, our little home has become our haven, safe place where we can relax and remove ourselves from the weekly stresses – but this can only be done if the house is in a liveable condition. A clean house = a clear mind.

I know that every couple’s dynamic is different and sometimes things just get a bit too difficult to cope, but if you have chosen this person you have chosen them for a reason – and even if the relationship bends a little bit sometimes, if its still not broken then it can be saved.

Peace.

 

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